Do The Thing Anyway: The Journey of an Artist
Local Artist Feature- Death Ray Robin (columbia, south carolina, usa)
Part 1
On a chilly night in December, a friend and I attended a Black Nerd Mafia event in my hometown of Columbia, South Carolina. Black Nerd Mafia creates events that center the creative and educational experiences of Black folks. Their events are gathering spaces for authors, creatives, musicians, and artists to connect. I was hesitant to leave my house, but I’m so glad I went because I was granted the opportunity to meet Desirée aka Death Ray Robin.
Upon arriving at the venue, I scurried in a nervous fluster to the bathroom. I saw Desirée at the sink and she was oh so kind in her beautiful bubblegum pink puffy gown and crown. I knew her performance would be great from our short conversation; however, I had no idea I was in for such a fun, creative treat.
Sweet melodies, gentle (sometimes not!) keys, and catchy hooks from Death Ray Robin’s warm lullaby-like voice filled the gallery space. She had the audience in her hands as we were sung to about love, loss, cycles of change, and how life goes on regardless. After she finished performing, I immediately said, “I need to interview her.”1
The Seoul, Korea born artist and educator graciously provided energy and time towards the interview you all are about to read. I hope each of you enjoy it!2
But first, how’d you land on the stage name “Death Ray Robin”?
D: My name is Desirée Robin Richardson
A: This name sounds like a superhero…
D: I wanted something that sounded fatalistic and hopeful at the same time. Death Ray is a weapon of destruction and Robin is a symbol of hope.
They say a robin’s chest is red because it went up to Christ and kissed him when he was on the cross.
On going to USC (University of South Carolina) for a B.A. in Music, and her background as a vocalist:
D: I went to a fine arts middle school and high school (in Augusta, GA), and I learned how to sing there. When I was about 17, I started taking formal voice lessons. I knew that that was something I could be good at and that’s why I went to school for music, because I wasn’t planning to go to school at all. Our school was really competitive, and they wanted to be able to say, like, “100% of our students are either in college or they’re joining the military.”
A: Oh yeah they like to do that to say, “Hey, you can look forward to your child being successful in this way.”
D: Our guidance counselor called me into her office and said to me, “you haven’t taken the SAT yet?” I was like, “I know.” And she asked, “why not?” I answered, “Oh, I’m not going to college.” And without asking my parents or me if I wanted to, she made a phone call to the College Board: “Hi, I would like to make an appointment for someone to take the SAT this weekend.”
A: Whoa, that’s fast, yeah.
D: That was on a Wednesday and on Saturday, I took the SAT. I was already doing music because of school. I thought I wasn’t good at these other subjects so I studied music at Univeristy of South Carolina (in Columbia, SC). My freshman year of college my boyfriend broke up with me, so I decided I would try to join a band. I went on to Craiglist like, “Female Vocalist looking for a band!”
A: You found one???
D: I did. I did. And that’s how I got involved in the Columbia music scene.
Pandercakes was that band
D: Pandercakes… we were on Fork and Spoon Records. Are you familiar with Toro y Moi?
A: YEAH!
D: Toro y Moi. He heard our song and posted it on his Tumblr.
Me: Stop!
D: It went “viral” for 2012. I was studying in Korea at the time, but I happened to be home (in the States) for the holidays. Everybody was calling me and texting, “Hey, your song got picked up!”
D: That was my brush with “fame.” Nothing ever happened with it. I went back to Korea to finish my year abroad, and we lost momentum. When I came home, Pandercakes tried to pick back up where we started. Our songwriter, guitarist, and lead vocalist (we took turns singing lead), moved away to pursue his masters in medical illustration. I think we had a split EP with Jordan Blackmon’s Pussy Wizard project, but after that, we never finished our final recordings.
I didn’t do my own music for like, 10-12 years, but I was still playing in other people’s bands playing keyboards or singing background vocals. I felt like I was always doing that. I think I was in 5 or 6 groups at one point.
One of which being Say Femme- Souvenirs - EP | Say Femme
A: What made you want to come back and make your own music?
D: That kind of happened around 2019. I teach music lessons, and there was this kid who would always miss his piano lesson on Tuesdays. I had this gap in my schedule, so during what should have been his piano lesson, I started writing songs. I wrote around 10 songs in a period of three months and didn’t do anything with them.
My friend Tyler Gordon asked me in February 2020 if I wanted to play a show with him showcasing my own music. I felt, “I don’t know if I can do it. I’m kind of scared.” He’s like, “No, you got it. It’s February now. The show is March 31st.”
A: That’s kinda soon.
D: The [COVID] shutdown happened March 20th, so we had our show virtually. That was my first show, but I did it. I started doing solo music because I wasn't able to meet up with my friends, and I was also kind of tired of being a bridesmaid…
On dealing with the ego as an artist + Schooling experience in Korea as a Black-Korean vocalist
D: I had a lot of ego problems. I felt like I was overlooked. I think that I’m a good singer. I think that I’m an okay pianist. I’d ask myself, “How come no one’s noticing me?” The solo work kind of stemmed from that.
I’m not trying to be like a big star or anything, but I just felt… I felt invisible. I would play in these bands and hear, “Oh, I didn’t know you were in that band.” I know it’s not all about me, but I’m the only girl in this band; I’m the only Black girl, or I’m the only Black person in this band. How can you miss me? Like???
I think a lot of it came from the feeling, “Nobody notices me.” I felt like a shadow, so I decided I would do my own thing.
I had my first in-person show in April of 2021. It was for an event called the Grunge Prom, and it was put on by my friend Ginevra Hardin and her company. It was like a thrift type of company called the Beautiful Neighborhood. [...] [The event] was held in the back parking lot of the Tapp’s Outpost in Columbia, SC.
I was by myself. I was playing my songs. I felt embarrassed by being seen and heard at the same time. My body had been changing. I’m thinking, “I’m hideous!! Everyone’s gonna see me, and they’re gonna think I’m so ugly and blah, blah, blah,” You know, that kind of thing. But I did it anyway.
And, I don't know, people received it well, and it made me realize, “Wow, I can be who I am and not have to alter anything, and I can still be received.” And that kind of changed my worldview on a few things, like, you don't have to present yourself in any type of way, if people can connect with your music.
A: And I think, too, what you’re getting at here, which I relate to a lot, as somebody I was closeted for like, 10+ years from my age 10/11, and then I [began] coming out at 22/23.3
D: That’s a long time.
A: But I technically forced myself to forget who I was, and I think that there was a profound impact when it came to ego and like, “okay, I can show myself as I am. I can share [all of] myself with people” and not be, you know, “so afraid.” I feel like I’m only now on the other side a little bit. It’s hard, so I feel you on that. Not in the same way, but I do understand where you’re coming from.
[...]
Was there ever a moment where you felt like you found your voice? Cause I know some people can get in the studio and [hear their voice] be like “wait that’s me?”
D: Well, I don't know. I think that I judge myself more harshly than I would judge someone else. When I hear my vocals in the studio, I'm like, “Let's re-record this.” My engineer’s like, “We're not re-recording, you gotta stop.” As far as finding my voice, I thought that maybe I was close to it before I got sick in November [2025]. So I feel like I'm having to relearn my instrument. It's only been like a month. I really have to relearn my instrument, relearn my body. I'm using an inhaler now…
[...]
D: I want to take voice lessons again, but I'm kind of embarrassed to reach out to my teacher because I don't want her to hear me. “Yeah, this is what I sound like now…” because classical style, bel canto style is different… I'm doing pop music, I guess.
A: It is a different kind of training for sure.
D: It is. There is some overlap, but I'm learning that I gotta do my own thing, because I'm having a hard time singing pop music. I can't, I can't do riffs and runs, not the way that I would like to hear them.
A: How would you like to hear them?
D: I want to sound like Beyoncé, and I don’t! But I don’t have to sound like Beyoncé! Beyoncé is Beyoncé!
A: *laughs* You sound like you. You have a very beautiful voice,I feel like it’s so complimentary. It’s a little lullaby-like. It;s similar to the feeling of being held, and then there are times where your voice is more grunge, more punk, like you have a very complimentary use of your voice.
I was wondering about your time in Korea [studying abroad]. I know you did some studying. What was that like?
D: Oh, yeah, it was great. I was there for a year. I was studying Korean language and vocal literature. So I was studying, funny enough, Western classical music in Korea.
A: What did that look like? How did it influence your music?
D: In some ways, it was the same. I took the vocal lit class in Korean. The course was supposed to be in English, and my teacher privately addressed that, but she said, “I give my lectures in Korean.” So I’m sitting here, I understand 30% of the language. I’m understanding some of this. I don’t know. So I want to say yes, it’s similar, yeah, but I can’t tell you for sure, yeah, because it was in Korean. [...] I sang in the choir at my school [Sookmyung Women’s University], and I learned the music that I would also learn about or sing at USC. Along with all the classical pieces from Europe, they had Korean music peppered in as well.
I would say the experience impacted me, just being in an environment where you don't understand everything… it made me realize that maybe I can survive.[...] I don't feel like I can always do hard things, but I was in an environment where I didn't understand anything, and I was still able to communicate what I needed sufficiently. I was able to get places, so I can do it.
When I was there, I went to some cultural performances. There’s a type of Korean folk singing called pansori. It’s interesting singing. That’s something I’ve always thought about bringing to my singing… At least glimmers of it. I’m inspired by it, but I don’t think I can actually learn it without actual training, but yeah, it’s like a UNESCO heritage [Intangible Cultural Heritage of Humanity]. I’m really inspired by that, and I want to bring some of it to my music.
Pansori:
This concludes part 1 of our conversation. I am really excited to share part 2 soon. In the second part, we’re going to chat about songwriting, influences + inspirations, and her anti-capitalist hit “Boss Babe (You Can Have It).” Big shoutout to Desirée. She did much of the editing for her voice in the convo.
Please check out Death Ray Robin’s YouTube page and Bandcamp.
One of my personal favorites, as well as a recent release, “Soup for the Soulless” is an amalgam of so much…
Soup for the Soulless | Death Ray Robin |
I find encountering artists new to me to be a hit or miss. I am an “old school fool.” Okay? I like certain sounds. My ears can be quite stubborn with regard to my regular music listening. Therefore, when I run into artists that break into my sound barrier, they are intriguing to me. Death Ray Robin is absolutely one of those artists.
This interview is chopped and screwed real good. I found myself inspired by Shanté formatting on her substack! Y’all go follow + subscribe to them.
It’s a long ass, crazy ass story y’all LMAO. [I can only laugh a LITTLE now] I am still opening more doors and playing with labels. Non-binary queer or non-binary lesbian suit me for now.
i’m excited to dive into this! thank you for the shoutout 🫶🏾